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September 16, 2011

After five years of foster care, Amy Hewitt Bonin was adopted into a family that she characterizes as “a bit dysfunctional.” She grew up feeling as though she did not have a voice or a right to be heard.

In high school, Bonin felt that she had no niche and was bullied for her clothes, personality, and being in the orchestra.

“I was told I need to stop saying hello to the ‘popular’ kids because I was trying too hard,” told The Survivors Club

Eventually, Bonin changed schools and things improved. However, she still struggled with depression and self-harm. After a failed marriage at age 30, Bonin sought help for her depression and happily admits that she saw things turning around.

Inspired to help others survive and overcome bullying in all its forms, Bonin created the Facebook community Standing Up for Victims of Bullies (Child and Adult). When the group was founded in January 2011, Bonin hoped to offer a safe outlet for people to tell their stories and experiences with bullying.

“I find writing my story…very therapeutic and that is exactly what I tell my members,” she shared with TSC.

She initially created the support group exclusively for friends and family members, but later expanded as she realized the need for a strong anti-bullying community. Standing Up for Victims currently collaborates with other anti-bullying sites with the goal of working together to stop people from being hurt and abused.

Besides being an abuse survivor, Bonin has also survived depression, but now lives in Iowa with her husband and two children, which she identifies as her “huge support system.” She just graduated with a degree in Human Services and intends to return to school and become a mental health counselor.

”I am a happy adult, who has a lot of past baggage, but quite frankly, that baggage…is who I am today,” Bonin said.

Bonin recognizes the value of speaking out after having shared her story, and she is continuously inspired when her readers share their personal stories with the anti-bullying community.

”People tell me that in sharing my own experiences with them and being so open and honest about them, they feel as if they ware ready to open up and do the same…they are now willing to share a story that they have kept secret for so long.”

Bonin has a simple message for anyone dealing with bullying or depression: “You are not alone. You can do this, and you will be ok. Just reach out, and ask for help.”

Standing Up for Victims defines bullying as all of the following: verbal bullying, social isolation, physical violence, false rumors, racial, sexual, and cyber bullying (via cell phone or Internet).

The group’s motto, “Be Proactive—Not Reactive!” emphasizes their desire to fundamentally change the social environment, rather than just react to specific instances of bullying.

Standing Up for Victims welcomes visitors with the following message: “We are here to make suggestions and offer insight and to help others. Victims of bullies come from all walks of life. We stand for ALL of them, and are not discriminatory. This includes but is not limited to: Children, adults, communities, workplace, the LGBT community, mental health disorders, mentally challenged, disabilities of any kind (physical, learning, or mental), autism, neurological disorders, and people who are thinking about committing suicide.”

Standing Up for Victims can be reached through Facebook and its blog community. As of publication time, the Facebook group consisted of 3,044 active members.

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