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September 8, 2010

Stress over becoming a student begins in pre-school for some children. Parents are now wondering if their four-year-olds are suffering from depression.

By the time they get to kindergarten, parents face the decision over whether or not they should "red-shirt" their five-year-old, holding him or her back a year so they they can be better prepared for the challenges of kindergarten.

As children get older, they begin to face things like peer pressure and, in growing numbers, bullying. It seems as if going "back-to-school" is a more daunting task every year. So what to do?

While it is of course important to focus on concepts like depression and bullying in children, it can be daunting and scary. However, there are simple things you can do to help your child have a positive emotional experience when he or she heads back to school.

One helpful tool to help your child face problems while he or she is away from home is to learn more about what the child's life in school is like. "The more details you know about your child’s school experience, the more valuable your questions will be," according to PBS.org. "If you know the teacher reads a story every day, ask 'What story did Mrs. Younger read today?' If you know the teacher’s newsletter comes home on Wednesday, set up a ritual to read it together at dinner. If you visit your child’s classroom, make note of new things you might want to discuss with your child later."

It can also help to discuss friendship and concerns about fitting in with your children. "Children care about being popular, but friendship rules," according to the PBS.org guide. "From about 2nd grade through high school, being popular becomes important to many children. But friendship is the thing that endures," advises Lawrence Cohen, Ph.D. "A friend wants you to be yourself and likes you for who you are. While not being in the 'in crowd' might seem devastating, encourage your child to simply make good friends. Help him nurture those friendships and the crisis over not being in the cool group should subside."

There are also ways in which you can help your child develop self-esteem, even if they are having problems socializing or are not exceeding in school. According to ChildDevelopmentInfo.com, "Parents, more than anyone else can promote their child's self-esteem ... In fact, most parents do it without even realizing that their words and actions have great impact on how their child or teenager feels about himself."

A bad day is a bad day, and kids will have many bad days at school. But it's important to notice if your child is showing more severe forms of anxiety or depression. Because kids, even pre-teens, can't always express themselves, this guide to childhood anxiety disorders can help you recognize behaviors and attitudes that might indicate a condition that needs special attention.

No matter what type of child you have, and whatever his or her disposition, or struggles in school may be, it's important for parents to be organized, positive, and not transfer their own anxiety or stresses about the school year onto their kids. The Detroit Free Press has some tips for helping your kids have a positive experience in school.

Do you have any good tips for helping a child cope with school struggles? Share your advice and ideas by leaving a comment below.

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